segunda-feira, 26 de outubro de 2015

[ Discursivas CACD ] Inglês 2014: Composition




























Guia do Calango Lumbrera - Turma CACD 2014


Prova 2014 INGLÊS 

OBS: Respostas com Maior e Menor notas apuradas entre as publicadas no guia do Calango


COMPOSITION

The most intense conflicts, if overcome, leave behind a sense of security and calm that is not easily disturbed. It is just these intense conflicts and their conflagration which are needed to produce valuable and lasting results.

Carl Gustav Jung. The Structure and Dynamics of the Psyche. The Collected Works. V.8. Routledge: London, 1960. P. 26

In light of the quote above, comment on the possible positive effects, if any, of different conflicts throughout the twentieth century.

Maior Nota: ROBERTO SZATMARI (45,50/50)
  

"Throughout history, many thinkers have argued that crises and conflicts have positive effects for progress and civilization. German philosopher Hegel compared nations to trees, which occasionally needed to be shaken to be cleared of dead leaves. Proposed benefits of conflicts have included everything from technological development to increased unity and moral edification. As our economic and political analyses improve, however, these views seem increasingly quixotic and untenable.

It is certainly true that the need to best your opponent in a conflict creates a demand for innovation rarely seen in peacetime. The need to break German codes in World War II led to the invention of the first computers and the Manhattan Project drove advances in theoretical physics that went far beyond the creation of the atom bomb.

Another argument suggests that conflicts bring more intangible benefits to populations, by boosting morale and providing a sense of purpose. In this view, Americans in the Cold War enjoyed a sense of kinship with others in the western bloc and their struggles in their daily lives could be seen as part of a broader struggle to prove that their model of society was the superior one. This reflected in the space race, in Hollywood films and in the Olympics.

A third argument claims that it is not the conflict itself that brings prosperity, but its aftermath. A return of soldiers from the front could boost demand and the end of the war effort would raise supply accordingly, driving economic growth. More importantly, the post-conflict world would build new institutions to guarantee lasting progress, such as the creation of the UN and the Bretton Woods system.

All of these views contain some truth, yet all vastly understate the damage brought by conflict. Perhaps unsurprisingly, they tend to be formulated in times of peace and prosperity, not war.

In Europe, pre-World War I levels of growth and prosperity were only matched late in the twentieth century. Political freedoms, in some areas, were not re-established until the end of the Cold War. In conflicts on the periphery of the Cold War, such as in Africa and in Southeast Asia, it is hard to argue for any plausible benefits at all.

Further, technological progress has been proceeding at an extraordinary pace ever since the IT revolution, much of which happened after the end of the Cold War.

Upon more careful analysis, it is clear that conflicts bring guaranteed strife and uncertain benefits. Rather than looking to conflict as a necessary catharsis, it is more important to recognize the positive effects of peace and stability and to always bear in mind the devastating human cost of the twentieth century conflicts."

Organização e desenvolvimento de ideias: 18/20 
Qualidade de linguagem: 9,5/10
Correção gramatical: 18/20

Menor Nota (23,5/50)

"The twentieth century was the bloodiest in recorded history. Its first half encompassed two World Wars; in its second half, a plethora of small conflicts ravaged underdeveloped nations, particularly in Africa. It is not safe to assume that all the conflicts which took place throughout the twentieth century have produced positive effects. In some cases, they did; in others, they jeopardized state sovereignty and national cohesion, leaving behind nothing but chaos.

A long and cruel war can bring forward the preciousness of peace. High death tolls and V exhaustion of resources make states and national societies more willing not only to celebrate peace, but also to avert new quagmires that would lead to conflict. In no other region this choice has been more enthusiastically embraced than in Europe. After the second World War, rivalries between France and Germany gave way to integrating efforts that addressed the cultural, economic and social issues that once had led to the worst carnage ever registered.

Although serving as a beacon to guide other international integrating efforts, Europe has a dynamics of its own. Other regions did not fare that well in post-conflict scenarios. V Positive effects of war are more likely to appear when societies are galvanized towards the pursuit of peace. Should conflict affect the very fabric of societies, it would be harder to sustain broad arrangements for lasting peace. The civil strifes that ravaged African countries such as Somalia, Rwanda and Guinea-Bissau still are being dealt with by the African Union, which is focused in providing the means for those states to achieve peace within their territories.

The comparison between European and African panoramas reveals that different conflicts throughout the twentieth century have produced different results. When these conflicts have affected well-formed, fully-fledged national societies, such as the European ones, a lasting peace could follow the end of war; conversely, should the strife tear up national cohesion, which happened in Africa, positive outcomes are not so easy to spot. The African Union, for instance, is rather a collective answer to dire instability than a benefit from those conflicts. 


Beyond political instability, conflicts in Africa also left a dark legacy of lack of infrastructure and undedevelopment. Eventually, Africa might finally overcome the challenges derived from the twetieth-century conflicts. Some countries such as South Africa and Nigeria have achieved stability and have prospered. Nonetheless, the healing of the African wounds will be a substantially different process than that of the Europeans."

Organização e desenvolvimento de ideias: 15/20 
Qualidade de linguagem: 6,5/10
Correção gramatical: 2/20


Comentários do autor: Observações do primeiro examinador (conteúdo): “Well thought of comparison – Europe x Africa. Sound structure and development of ideas”. Dois pontos a menos em gramática, a redação sequer teria sido corrigida. Cometi erros diversos, variados e sortidos, de colocação, de escolha vocabular, de ortografia. Creio que o conteúdo salvou a redação. Sugestão aos candidatos: preocupem- se com a gramática, ela é fundamental; mas não descuidem do conteúdo, ele pode salvar sua prova.

FONTE: Guia Calango Lumbrera - Turma IRB 2014 

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